


A felony of pearls

by Kirrithian



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: Arrest, Arson, Empire City, Era Three, Flashback, Framed, Fun, Gen, Jail, Mistaken Identity, The Renegade Pearl, bad pearls, criminals, pearls, tux pearl
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-07
Updated: 2021-03-07
Packaged: 2021-03-13 17:55:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,323
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29904888
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kirrithian/pseuds/Kirrithian
Summary: After a trip to Empire City goes awry and Pearl ends up in a police cell, a run in with a group of rule breaking pearls might just save the day."What on Earth did you do to them?!""Oh," she drew the word out, "that. Well we might have rearranged some of their credit systems to collect a bit of money.""That's stealing!""It's not as if they were using it!" she protested, "it was just lying around,""...in a bank account,""Several, actually. Yeah, they got pretty upset about it.""Upset?!" Pearl thumped against the bars again, setting them ringing. "Have you seen this? They think I did it!"
Comments: 1
Kudos: 5





	A felony of pearls

This had to be a mistake....

...right?

Pearl perched up on the long thin bench, pressed up against cold breeze block wall so she wouldn't fall off. She was on her own, the distant sounds of the city coming muted through the covered slip of window, her only connection to the world outside. She wasn't sure how long she'd been left down here- she wasn't even sure what time it was, the room permanently flooded with white light that blazed through the floor to ceiling bars, glaring off the whitewash and making her squint.

It was too bright in here.

She shifted again to brush some half seen dirt off her suit. It...hadn't been the evening she'd expected, ending up in a police cell. She'd come to Empire city with Greg and Steven for a nice family night out, going to see the new Docopter musical, a friendly reprise of their visit two years ago. It had gone well and they had been happily chatting about the show on their way back to the van when they found themselves surrounded by police, guns, and a lot of shouting. By the time they'd realised they were after her and that the best response was to 'go quietly', she'd already been jumped by three of the humans, and it had taken great restraint on her part not to simply toss them aside. _'Go quietly'_. She still found herself bundled unceremoniously into the back of the police van, an ignominious end to what had been a rather pleasant evening.

The pattern repeated inside the police station, pulled here and there from nondescript room to nondescript room. There had been questions, and barely any answers too, the humans the other side of the desk asking not about her driving infraction from the previous year but something else entirely, her sheer confusion and apparent lack of cooperation landing her back in the cells again. 

How long had it been? She had a watch in her gem- her phone too, but this place was under observation, a bulky camera hanging down in the corridor that stared almost straight into her cell. The Gems had done well to keep off the radar of human law enforcement for years, for good reason. If the humans really knew their full capabilities and saw them as a threat...who knew what would happen? So she had to play it cool, hiding meekly in plain sight, hoping they could sort all this out on friendly terms. It was a delicate situation, Pearl already regretting playing by their rules- her situation had been made so much worse by the fact she couldn't actually give them answers to questions like 'what's your full name?', 'where are you from?', and 'what's your date of birth?', her reticence taken as a sign of her guilt.

Her fingers traced along her collar now empty, the bowtie gone and her hat and jacket with it. A flicker of annoyance crossed her face. 'Friendly'. Their definition of friendly was...debatable, especially for someone who had repeatedly told them of her innocence. At least she was okay- some of those human weapons were dangerous, even for a gem. Hopefully Greg and Steven were okay too. She didn't think they'd been arrested, but she didn't know and the thoughts that they were stuck experiencing the same thing alone played at the edge of her mind. Whatever they were doing, it had to be so late by now, she hoped they would be sensible enough to try and get some sleep. She shifted again on the uncomfortable bench. Sleep. It was a good thing she didn't need to, it gave her plenty of time to ponder what landed her in here.

Or who.

Eventually her thoughts were interrupted with a jangle of keys, not to her cell, but to the room beyond, metal doors rattling as they slid back. "You've got visitors."

"Pearl!" 

"Steven!" Greg was there too and she met them at the door, sharing an awkward half hug through the bars. Brief guilt at keeping them awake was quickly quashed in her relief. It was good to see them. Now she had a chance of getting this sorted out.

-

Steven had struggled to settle in the sparsely decorated reception room, pacing back and forth worrying about Pearl. It'd been hours, just waiting for news, something to tell them she was okay, but they'd heard nothing, just assertions that she was being processed, or questioned. It sounded very official. Serious. They'd known that when they realised quite how many officers they'd turned out for the arrest.

'Steven, it's going to be okay,' she'd tried to tell him, 'it's-' He winced, clenching up at the memories of her disappearing under a pile of bodies on the floor, the moment slipping out of control so quickly.

'It's going to be okay.'

She'd said that before.

His dad was still up at the desk, looking distinctly out of place in his tux, trying to sort something out. He'd been up and down or on the phone for almost the whole time they'd been here, and every now and then he'd look back and smile as if to say 'don't worry, we've got this.'

'It's okay'

But... it wasn't.

Pearl could be going to _jail_ , stuck locked away from them for years in those awful places, surrounded by criminals, having to live a double life hiding her gem powers from everyone there. They shouldn't have let her go so easily, their reluctance to make a scene and draw attention to gemkind now leaving her vulnerable, a gem in a very observed position. If the humans decided they were a threat... His thoughts turned again to the idea of breaking her out, but...

No, they had to do this by the books, the human way. His hand drifted towards his gem yet again. Human. His stomach lurched. He wanted to help but he knew so little of how this worked that he wasn't sure how much help he could be. He toyed with the idea of calling Connie; she would have a better idea of what to do, her dad was a security officer after all, but he didn't want to wake her.

He found himself yawning, head starting to droop when his dad spoke.

"Hey Schtu-ball! Guess what?"

Steven perked up. "They're letting her go?"

"No, but we can go down and see her. Come on."

He couldn't describe the relief when he saw her, "Are you okay?" he asked. "We've been worried sick."

"I'm fine," she assured him, "really."

She looked fine, smiling back at him, but she was there, stuck behind bars, and he couldn't get the image of them dragging her away out his head. Tears welled up. "You can't go to prison!" He flustered as his mind slipped back to images of her trapped away in a cold dingy cell, unable to see a friendly face for days on end apart from short visits where they'd tell her of all the fun things she was missing out on. "We were going to go out on picnics, and visit of all those gem places on Earth, and go to that ren fair and all play beach-a-polooza together!"

"Woah Schtu-ball, Pearl's not going to jail. This is just the police trying to figure out what happened. They don't even have firm proof that she has done anything yet. If they did, they would have already charged her!"

Steven's face dropped even further into upset horror.

"Steven, it's okay," Pearl assured him, "it's just some misunderstanding. We'll talk to them and get this all cleared up in no time!" She smiled at him, but he could tell it was a little forced, encouragement put on just for him. But it did make him feel a bit better. "Just leave it to us hmm?" He nodded.

"Okay."

"Now, I need to have a quiet word with Greg." She tapped against the bars, waiting, watching him with that same smile until he retreated up the corridor. Adult talk. They were still worried, he could tell. He perched on the steps by the door, just about catching their dropped voices.

"Have you been able to find out what's going on? They asked a lot of questions, but not much of it made sense."

"...it's bad." Greg seemed uneasy. "I don't even know if I can cover bail. Me, bazillion rich guy! I was only just about able to wrangle a visit."

"Bail?"

Greg mumbled something in reply, a little 'oh' forming on Pearl's face, the subsequent conversation fallen beyond his hearing.

"...I'm certain I've never done anything like that- I wasn't even in Empire City on the dates they're talking about, but they didn't seem to believe me."

"We know that, but it's going to be difficult to prove- as a gem you're all over the place."

"...and not exactly registered."

"No. It's holding a lot of things up." 

Pearl had disappeared out of sight, once more pacing the short length of her cell. Argh, he _knew_ this was a bad idea! His thoughts turned back to plans of breaking her out, trying to figure how they could get Pearl away from this place and away from this suspicion she'd come under, but none of his ideas could stop making Pearl a wanted criminal. His fists clenched up again.

"Your lawyer's here."

He leapt up as the door behind him rattled and slid open to reveal the attorney, a spectacularly average bag-eyed office worker in an ill fitting shirt and red tie, her thick bushy hair tied back with a limp scrunchie that had as much energy and enthusiasm left in it as its owner. 

She turned past him with the slightest of waves. A flicker of recognition, a deja-vu caught him with a jolt and for a moment he thought he knew her, that he'd seen her somewhere before. But he had no idea where, no names coming to mind, just familiarity. Maybe she just had one of those faces that popped up everywhere or, more likely, he'd spotted her whilst they were at dinner earlier, back when they were all sat in the window laughing and chatting as they watched the workers swirl past at the end of the day.

She paid him no heed and kept going, 'let's have a look at what we've got then,' folder in hand, flicking through the pages as she paced up and down.

A lawyer. His heart rose. He'd seen the TV shows- they know what to do! She could get everything sorted out! Pearl seemed to think so too.

"Ah, great idea Greg, calling a lawyer! We should be able to get to the bottom of all of this just fine now."

There was an awkward pause. "I didn't." 

What? 

Steven's head snapped up, tracking the lawyer as she ambled down, Greg and Pearl still bickering away in the background. "I thought you had!" Greg said.

He ignored them. The 'lawyer' was chattering away, getting louder, bolder, and ever more excitable. "... fraud, money laundering, embezzlement, ooo I like that one! 'Embezzlement'. Em-bezzlement." She tried the word out a few times. "Got a nice ring to it."

Definitely not a lawyer. He meant to catch her, skipping after to stop this intruder in her tracks but Pearl got there before him, storming up to the bars and thumping into them with a clang. "You!"

He let out a gasp as he got a better look at the newcomer, this time spotting the dark oval on the the back of her hand and finally realising where he recognised the face. "You're a pearl!"

She held up her hand, revealing a second pearl underneath, this one a bright white.

"Two pearls! You're a fusion?" He looked her up and down: she was exactly the same size as Pearl. "How?"

She shrugged. "There's a knack to it."

"Never mind that: Where are the others?" Pearl demanded, still glaring at this newcomer, "they've got to be around here somewhere."

"Now now, no need to get tetchy."

"Say that to my face." 

Steven gaped at Pearl. He'd never heard her get this... aggressive with other gems before, let alone pearls. But true to form the pearl glowed, and separated out into two, a monochrome pair in black and white suits.

Pearl addressed the smaller one, stood in a smart blazer with a white and gold lapel. "I assume this is all your fault." Cold accusation dripped from her words.

The pearl shrugged.

"Er, hi!" He popped up between them with a little wave. "We haven't met, I'm Steven, Steven Universe."

"CEO, pleasure doing business." She shook his hand, her pearl cool under his grasp, then gave a nod to the pearl at her side, "that's Arson, and this," with a wave of her hand another pearl jumped out from her gem, a bundle of bright teeth, curls and blushes bursting into being in a pink flowery dress, "is Theft." Theft got straight to work at the lock on the door, pulling pins out her equally flowery hat. Pearl was still glaring at CEO.

"And the other one?" she asked pointedly.

"Oh, Larceny's upstairs on the cameras." CEO pointed at the camera in the corner, "Say hi!" The camera turned towards them, then shifted side to side. "She's the one who noticed you were in here. You know, I'm surprised. You don't usually come out this far."

"I don't usually spend an evening getting jumped by a load of police and getting stuck in a jail cell either!" said Pearl. "What on Earth did you do to them?!" 

"Oh," CEO drew the word out, " _that_. Well we might have rearranged some of their credit systems to collect a bit of money."

"That's stealing!" 

"It's not as if they were using it!" CEO protested, "it was just lying around,"

"...in a bank account," Arson finished with a grin, CEO chuckling too.

"Several, actually. Yeah, they got pretty upset about it."

"Upset?!" Pearl thumped against the bars again, setting them ringing. " _Have you seen this?_ They think **I** did it!"

"That is a _bit_ regrettable."

"Ugh!" For a moment it looked like Pearl would poof her then and there with her bare hands, then she backed off, pacing up and down the cell to work off some steam. "Wait," she stopped, and frowned. "If you didn't know _I_ was here, then why are you?"

"Ah, yes." CEO shifted. "That. The humans were starting to get a bit pushy, freezing accounts here, collecting evidence there... Let's just say we just stopped by to retrieve some of our things."

Pearl's eyes widened. "You were going to steal the evidence!"

"Steal, destroy..." CEO shrugged, "it was an inconvenience, and we figured we should get rid of it, much easier after all the effort they've gone to of collecting it all together. By their own rules it makes it more difficult for them to charge us that way. Who knew(?)" 

Clearly, they did.

"You won't get away with this," Pearl declared.

"Oh?" And just how are you going to stop me?" Pearl made a swipe through the bars but she stayed well out of range, laughing and mocking her as Pearl attempted to reach her again and again.

Wait, this wasn't fair! Steven realised he was outnumbered, and still a little outsized. An idea came.

"Ah-hem." CEO froze, then looked up to see Steven looming over her, his gem glowing. The pearl backed off, bumping into Arson with a jolt.

"Ah, yes, well-" she readjusted her jacket, gathering herself "-just a bit of fun. Alright?"

"Does this look FUN to you?!" Pearl fumed, taking another swipe.

"Alright jailbird, I know you're a little upset with this-" CEO waved at the cell, "-mix up, and that's fair- it's not your fault. You don't need to worry; we're going to bust you out." She smirked as the cell door clicked and swung open. "Call it evens." 

Pearl stepped forward, grabbed the door and pulled it shut again with a clunk. "That's not how this works."

"Why not?"

"It's illegal!" Pearl protested, "against the rules."

"Ugh!" CEO groaned, muttering under her breath, "you try to give a dime...! Hey!" her head snapped up, fixing a glare on Pearl, "since when did _you_ care about the rules anyway?"

"Since I lived on Earth, and learned to live with humans! With!" Pearl levelled at her.

"So? We're living 'with' humans, what's the big deal? You've broken rules before _Renegade_."

"That was different." Pearl shifted a bit, hands playing over each other, "there was a war. We had to do what we could to protect humans, but that's all it was. Everything we were doing was to protect them, to protect Earth! We had to! If we didn't there would be no humans! But now, even after everything we've done- _especially_ after everything we've done, this is still their planet and that means if we're involved in human activities, we should be following their laws."

"But their rules are stupid," CEO scoffed, "I mean look at this:" she waved the folder again, "they have more rules around this money than they do for keeping themselves alive!"

"That's none of our business: They're there to keep them safe, and to keep everything working. There's nothing wrong with that. If you're deliberately messing with them, stealing from them, there's going to be reprisals, and you need to take responsibility for that. You can't just do whatever you want, interfering with other peoples lives and not expect consequences."

"It's not like we're hurting them!" CEO huffed. "This is ridiculous."

"If you don't like it then you have to change or leave. I've heard too many reports of your shenanigans: If you keep going on the path you're on, if you annoy the humans enough they'll eventually run you off the planet. That's fine, that can be your choice. But if in the process you end up doing something that damages human-gem relationships forever you'll lose any support you might get from gems too. Maybe you should think about that too." Pearl looked up at the bars with a sigh. "Freedom is one thing, but to keep that we have to coexist peacefully, which involves a little bit of compromise. I know it isn't natural for us, having spent so long just living as gems, but it is possible if you give it the chance. A few rules, that's all we ask, just to keep them happy. It won't stop you from the freedoms of Era Three. There's still plenty of wonderful new experiences and people and activities and a whole beautiful planet to discover out there. You can still do all of that."

"Ugh," CEO flushed up, "this is why they say you shouldn't meet your heroes." She shot Pearl a rather resentful look. "I never figured you for a stick in the mud. 'The rebel'. You've sold out Pearl, lost your edge."

"All I'm asking is for you to follow their laws," said Pearl, scowling, "it's not rocket science."

"Oh yeah? And how's that working out for you?"

"Fine until **you** came along!"

CEO laughed.

"Oh, you think this is funny?" Pearl said. "You didn't even need to worry about that if you let them be. All you had to do was leave them alone," Pearl pointed out, "and this would all be fine. But no. You just had to interfere, poke around in something you don't understand."

"Oh I understand perfectly; that's why it's so funny." CEO smirked, putting on a mocking voice; "Oh no, my arbitary valuation system has been put slightly out of whack, whatever shall I do(?)"

"This is serious!"

"Have you seen what they do with that thing? It's hi-larious."

Greg spoke up. "It's not." The new pearls looked surprised to hear him speak. "It's how we live! You can't just rock in and walk all over that."

"They're right:" Steven finally added, "if you keep doing this, you're going to get noticed, not just as criminals, but as gems. They could decide you are a threat, that all gems are a threat. Everything the Crystal Gems fought for on Earth; everything we've built here would be ruined, because of you." 

CEO went to scoff, but Steven cut across her. "I just want us to live peacefully, is that too much to ask?"

"Eugh, whatever." CEO wagged a finger. "None of this gets your friend out of this little predicament though."

"No," Steven fixed her with a steely glare, "but you will." 

"Me?"

"Yep. You got her in here, you get her out- _without_ just breaking her out. You gotta clear her name, make sure they have no interest in coming after us again."

CEO rolled her eyes, checking from one to the other as she weighed up her options. "Fiiiiinnnnee. We'll figure a way to sort this whole thing out, apologise to the humans or something so they'll get off your back. Leave it to us. We were going to get her out of here anyway. Us Pearls always stick together, right Renegade?" 

Pearl glared at her, arms crossed.

Arson spoke up, "We're going to need a plan Chief."

CEO smiled. "I've got just the thing." She snapped her fingers, barking out orders, "Arson, Theft, we'll need a distraction, and a getaway. Larceny, once you've got those records meet me in the back office. You too Arson. Seems we've got some unfinished business with this inspector of theirs."

"Yes sir!" Arson and Theft pulled together, fusing into another pearl half wearing a greyish workers jumpsuit, tied up around the waist. She cracked her knuckles, pulled out a bottle with a piece of cloth stuffed in the top and strode out the door. Steven and Greg watched her go with alarm.

Steven rounded on CEO. "Getaway?! What are you up to? Didn't I just say-"

She held up her hands to stave him off: "Relax, I said we were going to sort it out didn't I? RIOT's going to work a charm, they'll have no excuse not to let Pearl go after this."

Steven went a little bug-eyed. "What have we just been saying about not upsetting the humans? You can't just cause a riot, it'd-!"

"No no," CEO interrupted, "that's her name, she's actually called RIOT." 

"-oh." He could hear the quiet smack of palm on gem from Pearl behind her. Steven shifted a little, "have you named all yourselves after crimes?" 

"Pretty much," she made a line for the door, "which reminds me I need to have a word with Larceny about renaming- Embezzlement sounds so much better than Forgery don't you think?" 

"Why?"

"Hmm?" CEO stopped and looked back at him. He was frowning.

"Why are you doing any of this? You don't even need money you're a gem! And there's so much more world and life out there you can enjoy without upsetting the humans. Why this? Why here?"

"Because we can," she shrugged. "Because it's fun." She seemed to notice his disapproval. "What? The humans set up all these little games, you can't blame us for playing them." With that she ambled back to the door with a wave, turned, and disappeared.

"Ugh." Pearl sighed, propping against the bars. "Sorry Steven, this was supposed to be a nice evening out and-"

"It's not your fault, it's theirs!"

"Steven," 

"They should never have done this in the first place! This isn't how gems are supposed to behave!"

"Steven," Pearl said, "we can't control every gem out there, just try to help them. We've been trying to get through to these pearls for a while now but they just ignore us, refusing to talk, or come to Homeschool. We've done all we can. We're in enough trouble because of them already. If they're going to make more, maybe it's best to just leave them to it. Let them have the consequences of their actions themselves."

Steven nodded. "Right. If they get in trouble with the humans, that's up to them." The positivity was short lived. "It's still going to be up to us to clear up whatever mess they make though."

That moment a loud siren struck up, the fire alarm getting louder and louder and filling the building with unavoidable noise. Steven twitched.

"Stars, what have they done now?" Pearl snapped Steven's attention back to her, her face falling into that familiar pattern of worry. "You two should get out of here," she said half-waving them towards the door, "find somewhere safe."

"But-" Steven protested.

"I'll be fine. We can sort this out once they're gone."

Outside was chaos, and the two of them were ignored as whatever police there were ran back and forward across the plaza. Sirens filled the air and a thick black plume of smoke rose up from behind the station.

There in the middle of it all the three pearls came striding down the steps, strutting like they owned the place. 

Steven stepped in front of them. "I can't let you do this."

CEO stopped, flanked by her two lackeys and raised an eyebrow. "Do what exactly?" 

"You have to stop this!" he insisted. "The stealing was bad enough. Letting someone innocent get caught up in your mess and take the fall for you is even worse, but recklessly endangering human lives like this... you've crossed a line. I can't ignore that!"

CEO made to move away, but he blocked her again.

"You're just going to walk away? You have to stay, you have to fix this!"

She fixed him with a guarded, incalculable look. "We don't have to do anything."

"You-"

"Oh yes, boss us around some more(!)" Sarcasm dripped from her words. "More orders, more rules. Go on," she challenged him, "try it and see what happens."

"You have to put this right."

CEO glared at him, bristling with a venom he hadn't seen before. "You don't get to tell me what to do."

"You gave me your word."

"Never said I would do it legally," she said. "Trust me, the humans are safe, and they're not going to bother you about our transgressions again either. We could have walked out then and there but we've done what you wanted; it's not my fault you don't like how. Now let us go."

"Trust you? What about Pearl? It's your fault she's in there. If something happens to her..."

"Pah!" she laughed. " _Our_ fault? Are you kidding me? We're gems. She could have shifted between the bars or busted straight out if she wanted to and you know it. She's only stuck in there because she's bending herself to someone else's rules once again." She levelled her gaze firmly at him.

"That's..." Steven shifted, rubbing his neck, "there's always going to be some rules, so people don't hurt each other. It's still doesn't mean you can't have your freedom, you just can't do everything you want all the time. There's other people you've got to think about."

"Like they ever thought about us?" CEO snapped, a gentle hand from Larceny stopping her from launching straight into him. She seemed to gather herself. "We always had to follow other peoples rules, well not anymore! This our freedom, our era! And we're going to do what we want. Now step out our way Universe- you don't want to make a scene."

"I can't. I get that you want to have your freedom I really do, but I can't let you do this, it's not right. We worked so hard for peace..."

Her eyes narrowed, honing in on him. "You realise your pearl's not going to get out if you don't let us go right? If we get caught," she spelt it out for him, oblivious to his mounting fury, "they're going to think she's one of us. I mean, in a way she is but... well, you don't want that, do you?" He tensed up yet again. "Uh uh uh," she warned him, "fighting us will just draw attention and expose everything we are to all these lovely witnesses, and you wouldn't want that now would you?" He subsided. She was right. "I didn't think so. Face it: you've got no authority over us Universe. Now stand aside."

"No, I- ugh!" Steven clutched at his head, still trying to find a way through this.

"You know I'm right." 

He wished she wasn't.

"Well, we'll be going now." CEO glanced around. "You've still got that bubble thing right?"

"Yeah, wh-" a loud screeching of tyres and a revving engine flared up behind him, and he jumped, the car skidding through where he'd been standing and coming to a halt in front of the pearls, Theft grinning at the wheel. They climbed in, watching him as he floated back down, before revving up and zooming off once more, weaving into the traffic and out of sight.

A hand caught his arm. "Let them go," Greg said, "they're not worth the hassle."

Pearl was quiet as they walked through the streets on the long route back to the van. 

She'd been released not long after they'd been allowed back into the station, the initial chaos over and the fire contained safely to a dumpster out the back. The inspector had conceded Pearl couldn't be the culprit having been in the cells throughout, all the while muttering something about 'that lunatic with the folder'. Coupled with the missing evidence and the error they'd made with the fire alarm ('I wasn't supposed to be left behind?'), they were more than happy to be rid of her. 

She paced in front, head down, barely noticing the damp paving slabs as she passed, jacket slung over her shoulder, streetlights shifting over her. The pearls had gone, back to their chaos and unfettered lawbreaking. More headaches for tomorrow, each whine of a siren bringing thoughts of their possible capture and all the complications and relief with it. This wasn't over by a long shot.

A bright light flooded over them, the headlights clicked on full from the alleyway forcing them to wince and turn away, caught in the beams.

Pearl stepped into the alleyway with a scowl. Sure enough it was the same car from earlier, Theft still in the front seat, and sat lounging on the bonnet was another pearl, another fusion; an amalgamation of the other three. She looked so much like Pearl, dressed to the nines in a tux, top hat set against slick black hair. 

She tipped it back. "You could join us Renegade," she called, echoes of CEO coming through, "have some real freedom. You don't have to follow these humans."

Pearl glared at her, sizing them up; picking her words carefully. "You're a fraud."

The pearl smiled, a little self-satisfied smirk. "Aren't I just?"

She stood and hopped over the windscreen, standing tall in the car proper like some queen on their chariot, her gaze not faltering from Pearl in the silence as they reversed, turned, and disappeared out of sight once more.

Pearl watched them go, stood staring after them. 

Steven joined her. "You okay?"

Pearl let out a forlorn sigh, waved her hat at the empty alleyway, and sighed again. "I'll be fine."

"We've not heard the last of them have we?"

"...no." She stared down the alleyway still. "We shouldn't have let them get away."

"We had to, this time." Steven tried to reassure her, "but maybe we'll get some sense into them if we come across them again."

"Next time... yeah." She seemed to brighten. "Yeah!" It barely lasted a second as her face fell again. "Oh no." Pearl let out a long drawn out groan, hand running through her hair. "Ugh! I don't believe it!"

"What?"

She turned to him, her annoyance plain to see; "Them!" She waved her hat at him; "I'm never going to be able to wear my tux again!"

**Author's Note:**

> Meet the felony: CEO, Arson, Larceny, and Theft. 
> 
> Characters were derived from the Penguins from Madagascar as a bit of a laugh, but then I got invested.


End file.
